The Freedom from Religion Foundation has a Christmas message
for everyone this season. The message, posted outside the
Madison Wisconsin capital building, next to the Christmas
season of the Winter Solstice may reason prevail. There
are no gods, no devils, no angels, no heaven or hell. There
is only our natural world. Religion is but myth and superstition
that hardens hearts and enslaves minds."
The Beefboy has
friends that would loudly disagree with that statement and
others that would applaud the Freedom from Religion Foundation
for posting a sign that so clearly reflects their views.
The Beefboy comes out somewhere in between, and that Beefanatics,
is where knowledge begins. So sit back, relax, enjoy, and
let The Beefboy do, what The Beefboy does best… and
that's break it right on down for you.
Religion Foundation President Anne Gaylor says that the
true meaning of the holiday is really a relic of sun worship.
"I have often said I am quite willing to celebrate
the fun parts of anyone's holiday, but spare me the religious
schmaltz," she said.
Okay, Ms. Gaylor,
everyone will spare you the religious schmaltz if you'll
spare us you're insensitive bitching. You see this goes
both ways. Religious zealots want to burn all atheists at
the stake. Atheists want everyone to evolve beyond the need
for comforting fairy tales. It ain't gonna happen folks.
Can we move on?
I can imagine
the snickering self-aggrandizing that the Foundation felt
when composing this sign. They must have thought, "Oh
boy, those religious freaks are really going to HATE THIS!"
The question I have for Ms. Gaylor and her band of boneheads
is, who is this sign for? If you're an atheist, you already
believe that way and you don't need a sign to spell it out
for you. If you're a Christian, there's no way that they
will read that sign and go, "Shazam! I've been wrong
all this time. I'm going to burn my Bible, subscribe to
the Spice Channel and buy Anne Geddes shit (clearly the
work of the devil)."
The only reason
to post a sign like that, right next to a Christmas display,
is to chap the Christians who enjoy it. This need for atheists
to practice one-upmanship comes from a steady diet of listening
to Christian pies like Pat Robertson telling everyone what
to do and shoving a HOLIER-THAN-THOU attitude down everyone's
throats. It comes from being made to feel like an outsider
because you have different beliefs and it also comes from
jealousy over religion's special days (What do atheists
have? Earth Day? That sucks nuts!).
in a very un-Christian-like manner when they seek to enter
politics and take over classrooms. Christian "leaders"
have taken it upon themselves to attempt influence in every
aspect of the human condition, meanwhile the church battles
corruption, scandal and diminishing participation, from
within. Here's an idea, how about tidying up your own little
sandbox before stealing the Tonka trucks that everyone else
is playing with? We haven't lived in the middle ages for
about 600 years; the days of THE CHURCH being in charge
are long over. Act like it. If you want to live in a country
ruled by the clergy, move to Iran.
So if atheists
are trying to get under the skin of Christians and Christians
are playing where they don't belong, perhaps we can come
up with a compromise. The Beefboy proposes "The Serial
Thriller's Religious Peace Accord," whereby atheists
leave Christians alone, particularly on their most sacred
holidays and Christians stay out of politics and the classroom
and concentrate on their flock, like they should be doing
Of course everyone
is going to continue to believe as they wish. That's the
benefit of living in a free society and to Hell with anyone
who thinks otherwise. Merry Christmas everyone!